I was thinking about the odd oxymoron of love today, as I cleaned my room and listened to a particularly interesting podcast that awakened my thoughts to Greek mythology. I don't know where this mindset comes from, my first instinct is to blame it on our Western mentality -simply from ignorance to whether it has been present in the past. Wherever it's origin, the social concept of heroism in love is so fascinatingly frustrating.

The scenario is so often the same, a fair maiden, a damsel of some serious distress, and a man who decides she is worth the effort to attempt to claim her for his own. He decides to pursue her, though his chances are slim, the world telling him to turn back, that she is too far out of his league, and that their relationship would never work out, and this situation yields four types of men:

1. The Fainters: ones who listen to reason and decide that she is not worth it. After all, why throw your life away chasing something that may not pay out in the end? Why risk being made a fool of? Aren't there plenty of other easier women in the world? Yet, the crowd gives a grunt of disgust at this gentlemen who so logically made his choice, and seems very displeased that he should give up so easily though odds were against him.

2. The Waiters: Men and knights of old who decide to bide their time in fair maiden's presence without opting to make any advances in making their passions or intentions known and wait for their odds in the role of a dice to improve. While neither lauded nor scorned by the crowd, spectators lean forward in expectation for rising developments since no protagonist can stay in this position for long before falling into one of the two next categories:

3. The Fool: A knight errant who sees fair lady, rushes to the highest tower, throws himself before his object of passion and eloquently begins to make his appeal only to be denied by a cold lover. Because he clings to the hope in his heart that things may change, she may have hidden feelings, or that he simply did not try hard enough the first time, our character sets out once again to prove how worthy he is of his fair lady's hand, scaling tower, crossing hill and dale, and dauntless pursues her only to find out her heart is with another.

4. The Hero: A gallant and noble man seeming no different than the Fool in his endeavors to procure his fair maiden. Both scale the same tower, cross the same hill and dale, and make the same pleas of earnest and abiding passion. However, whether fate and the stars were on his side, his delivery of passion was better, or maybe he just had a better physique?, he procures the lovely damsel's hand and rides off with her across his saddle bow into the sunset, where we naturally assume that they will live happily ever after. The audience then departs the pretty picture with the warm feeling that all is right with the world and that true love has won out in the end.

But how is this true love? How is this fair? The hero and the fool are the same in all their feats and endeavors. Both risked being made a fool of after failing, wasting time, effort, and energy on some maiden that may not even be as worthwhile as either of them thought, and both felt just as genuinely about the girl. In truth BOTH are fools, for why did they pick the girl in the tallest tower when there are plenty of hardworking and pretty milk maids to be had in any village a stone's throw away? Is this danger of losing so enchanting? Is it that we as society have trained our hearts to desire that which we cannot have or that is difficult to come by?

We have romanticized love (odd as that may sound) to the point that if it is not forbidden or secret or hard to come by, it is not worth our time or desires. Slake your lust on those easy to be had, but save all those romantic feelings for one that may not exist and will probably never be. We are in a quandary in our Western mindset of what true romance is, and - just as importantly - what true heroism is. Heros aren't made in the flashy fanfare of one who just happened to get lucky by doing something daring and risky and it by "fate" happened to work out. Heros are those who live the quiet life of love in hard times, stability in pain, and caring in the face of heartache or boredom, not some match that shines brightly to enchant a lover only to flicker out as soon as it has begun.

What is my point? What is my qualm? What is my remedy for this mess? I honestly don't know but earnestly question the realities around me in which I see. God is love, and in Him we know what true, real love is. But how does it look in the lives of love in His people? Is it godly to look for romantic or heroic love in the way we glorify in the realms of Westernism today? I don't think so, but I am still waiting to find out - if it is not a hero that is to come to sweep me off my feet, who then am I waiting for?


I wish for once my heart and mind
Would finally coincide
It seems that in this life of mine
They hardly can abide!

First one is off, wandering free
In the throws of romance and love
The other stalwart as can be
Focused on heavenly realms above

My mind is irked by my fervor
My heart annoyed by restrain
Yet both are in this together
Through fire or starry-crossed main

LORD, why did you give us emotion?
Father, why not just give us all brains?
Is it better to have loved at all and lost it?
I can't imagine it any other way.

Here I now stand - broken
Suddenly I feel so very cold.
Yet LORD, I know you have a purpose
And that alone makes me bold.

So Father, whatever your plan is
No matter the trials to come
I trust that my heart in your hand is
Till you lead this child safely Home.




I stumbled across my old box of poetry the other day, and after laughing at some of my exceptionally bad pieces I decided to post some of them on my old account at http://allpoetry.com/Sunchild. Check it out if you like. ;P

There seems to be something so freeing about sharing one's thoughts in the safe arms of rhythm and rhyme. Our muse is carried along by meter and thought, and is a medium that seems to be made all the better for its passion.




The theme of trust and faith seem so entwined with the Bible. From verses like,

"Trust in the LORD with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him and He will direct your paths" (Ps. 37:5) or
"Commit your way unto the LORD; trust also in him; and He shall bring it to pass" (Prov. 3:5-6), to simple doctrinal statements such as, "The just shall live by faith" (Rom. 2:17) the thesis of Christian living is a lifestyle of certainty, knowing that what God says, He will do.

This is the entire groundwork for our salvation, "We come by grace through faith" (Eph. 4:8a). I love the Bible's promises because it's not just like some vague "all will be well" inclination, but a statement that is made by the God by whom "all things consist." He knows the future, and cares for his people, he knows our "going outs and ins." Who could we trust more? His promises give me such serenity, though I forget far too often, but though my soul be troubled for a time, my soul remembers, and my soul returns to peace.

And they that know your name will put their trust in thee: for you, LORD, have not forsaken them that seek you...


My family and a few friends and I have just spent the last day in a Bible-type of retreat where we have gotten together to just.. study the word of God and read scripture. There have seldom been times in my life that I count as sweet as this. One of the verses we read today was a passage that I intently studies last summer when enduring a barren time from God's presence, it is the concept of God being found of those who search for him. One of my favorite and most descriptive passages of this is Deuteronomy 29:31:
But if from thence thou shalt seek the LORD thy God, thou shalt find him, if thou seek him with all they heart and with all thy soul. When thou art in tribulation, and all these things are come upon thee, even in the latter days, if thou turn to the LORD thy God, and shall be obedient unto his void; (For the LORD thy God is a merciful God) he will not forsake thee, neither destroy thee, not forget the covenant of thy fathers which he sware unto them.
How beautiful is that? God will be found of them who won't give up seeking him? He.. WANTS us to seek him. He WANTS us to find him. He WANTS us to chase after him as though he is the only thing that matters because... he is. My sister once told the analogy of how God is like a lover. He pulls himself away to see if we're willing to chase him. Just after he gives the ten commandments, God makes the statement that almost sounds like a wish: "O that there were such a heart in them, that they would fear me, and keep all my commandments always, that it might be well with them, and with their children for ever!"

When I was little, I used to wonder how I could make God happy. It seemed obvious in Sunday school that Jesus was happy when we did good and sad when we did bad, but as I grew older I learned that even if we gave God our all it would STILL never be enough to fulfill our debt and obligation to him. However this verse, it sounds like we CAN give God something that he can't have any other way - by having a sincere and honest desire to keep his commandments and follow his Word. As it turns out though, that IS our all.

I honestly WANT to be that person who chases after God with all that they have with no looking back. I WANT to follow God's commands and have a passion for his Word; to the very point that doing the right thing -eating spiritual food- comes as naturally as eating physical food. While I am sure that this is the cry of many a Christian's heart, I desire to join the ranks with many others and say, yes. Yes, to live as Christ is gain, and I count EVERYTHING else as loss.

"When you said, Seek my face; my heart said unto thee, Thy face, LORD, will I seek." Ps. 27:8

LORD give me grace...



While reading a book for an assignment for my Christian Studies class, I came across a frank quote that very aptly captured my own struggles with Christian love. I thought I'd share.
"Why is real Christian love so scarce in the world? It is because its cultivation requires nothing less than the reversal of every instinct in our fallen human natures. Love is against the grain of nature. It is against every fiber of our being as sinners. But nature, in the regenerate, is under the higher power of grace... What the unregenerate cannotdo, true Christians may and must."
-Maurice Roberts